The Letters of Saint Ambrose of Optina.
You are bothered with inappropriate fleshly lusts. When you should have a spiritual benefit, the Devil tries to tempt you. Despise it, because such suggestion from the enemy is an absurdity of absurdities. You write that it seems to you that someone is standing beside you during this struggle. Such things happen when a person either forgot some important sin at the confession, or did not manage to confess something as it should.
Pray to the Heavenly Queen and Guardian Angel asking their help to recall and confess sins. Then, the present dream will pass. Also you should be humble before God and men, considering yourself the worst of people.
I find it inappropriate for you to go to Moscow for the medical treatment because of the fleshly lusts. It will intensify the struggle ... It is better to suffer pain from the disease to cleanse your sins. It is more correct.